1800 and XX secs

that time is 1800 and XX secs.. i am at the bus stop waiting for my bus home today.. suddenly some thoughts stuck me.. and since i got a pen and some papers.. i wrote that down..

Qn: Have you wonder what's the burden and consequences of relationship?
Ans:
1) Costly price to be made
For those who are gentleman-like (me), won't the guys treats his girlfren, buy things for her, pay all the things for her, volunteer to show his "wealthy-ness" to her. my buddy and my Godbro's cases make me wonder.. am i REALLY ready to have a relationship and to spend all my Bank savings and use my ATM card for the FIRST time.. and sequencely use it all untill there are not much inside to buy all those branded stuffs and goods or cute soft toys for her..!

How can I afford to spend all my savings for university (u might be thinking.. i can work part time job during off sch hrs.. or during vacation.. but won't working affects my studies..given that i am so poor in managing time!) and give everything to her, but not aware that she will NOT have an everlasting relationship with me?..

2) Patience
Will i be patient enough to wait for my girlfren when she's 1hr.. 2hr.. or even she slp or even forget that we didn't arrange for a date?.. Will i be angered?.. Since i really really dun like ppl to be VERY late for so long.. and to be honest, sorry to say that but it's true, Gals like to spend their own sweet time dolling themselves.. No offences!

Will i also be willing to spend/waste time on watching them dress up.. testing blouses/shirts/shoes.. going long hours shopping with them?.. Will i be prepared to waste all my precious time?

3) Will I be.. Will I be so BIG heart enough to tolerant and accept and forget all their bad habits and poor practise of my galfren?

*4) Most imptly, Will I be able to balance and manage the time well between HER, my church frens, my close frens? and to study and work hard at the same time on my GPA?

---END of answer---

actually to be truthful, i juz 1 a galfren simply becoz my close ones around me have... but seeing one of my frens facing relationship.. another is getting better and trying to manage.. another going well.. which i am most willing to congrats them if they really get married..

there will be everlasting love.. but for my case.. i dun think it's so soon now.. after so many fail attempts.. and problems encountered.. i really sort of see thru the reality world.. others have boyfren- galfren.. doesn't mean i can have one too.. i can have 1.. but will it lasts long?.. will i.. will i.. that's too much sparkles of problems around.. and truthfully.. i am not prepared for a relationship.. financial wise i am not.. mentally i am not.. physically.. i can't depart well enuf with my galfren and family and frens.. i treat my frens very imptly.. and i put my family as one of the top priority..

after this reflection, i will buck up now.. and strive hard for my studies.. and to enter the Uni.. and earn a good stable job.. by then i can start looking for one... one that will last long.. yup.. :)